If it’s necessary to learn to fail so we can really live, then just how do we learn to fail well?
- Try hard things. This part’s actually kind of a no brainer. If you’re not failing, you’re probably not attempting anything difficult. It’s easy to succeed every time when you limit yourself to whatever’s easy. I can beat my 8 year old at chess EVERY TIME… but it’s not very gratifying and I don’t learn anything from the experience. Maybe you’re ok with a life like that, but I doubt it. (You probably wouldn’t read these posts very often if you were!)
- Try new things. You may be doing some hard things, but they’re all inside the realm of what you already know. Try to accomplish something new and you’ll probably fail a few times along the way. Congratulations. You just gave yourself an opportunity to learn.
- Don’t stay afraid. Failure scares us. Sometimes it scares us so much that we don’t take any action when we’re unsure of the outcome. We know it might not work out, so we cower in familiar shadows and pretend we’re not curious about what’s out there beyond our fear. What if you let your curiosity and faith overwhelm your fear? You’re not a cat, let your curiosity run around once in a while. Being afraid is normal. Just don’t stay that way.
- Forget who’s watching. We sometimes think failing diminishes who we are or something, and we don’t want to be diminished so we don’t risk anything that might end in failure. But does failing really make you less? Do you think less of Thomas Edison because he failed to create a usable lightbulb so many times? Seriously, has anyone failed to make a good light bulb more than Edison? But his failures fade in comparison to his advancements. So, maybe some people thought he was crazy to keep banging his head on the same filamental wall so many times. (Yes I know filamental is not a word, but it would be a cool one if it was!) Who cares what they think? Who are they anyway? (Beside the ones watching life from the sidelines. Don’t join them.) Truth be told… most people aren’t paying attention anyway and won’t notice your failure at all. So go ahead and pretend no one’s watching. Chances are, they aren’t.
- Learn from other people’s failures, too. Good news! You don’t have to make all the mistakes yourself. Just observe the world around you and you’re sure to notice somebody else failing, too. What can you learn from their mistakes?
Now that we know how to learn to fail, the next trick is to figure out how to actually learn from our failures…